Professor Marvel Never Guesses.

Posted by admin on March 16, 2015 in Relationships |

Kat and I get into the funniest conversations. The conversation last night was typical. We started out talking about spirits, ghosts, possession and such, then morphed into a dialogue about each other.

I guess it’s typical for someone not to see themselves as others see them. Kat is a very meek and mild person to some, but I have seen the other side of her. I shared these observations at first, largely because she’s a pretty humble girl who doesn’t really want to feel any particular significance in the world, largely because she doesn’t want to feed her ego, so she tells me.

I see her very differently, of course. As we talked, I drifted into one of my classic, colorful analogies that seemed to hit the nail right on the head.

As she continued to make protests, I said, “We’re the Wizard of Oz.”

She asked what I meant by that and I illustrated.

“I see myself as the Wizard of Oz,” I said. “I’m the socially awkward guy hiding behind the curtain, throwing all the levers and switches so others can’t see the real me. I’m the guy that doesn’t really know anything about anything. I just make stuff up on the fly. I’m the one who pretends to be a famous balloonist but can never come back because ‘I don’t know how it works.'”

I continued on. “I think I’m more Professor Marvel than Wizard though. Remember when he was in the wagon with Dorothy and Dorothy said, ‘Professor, can we go with you and see all the Crowned Heads of Europe?’ and Professor Marvel replied, ‘Do you know any…?'” That’s me.

I can be a bit of a humbug and charlatan. Not intentionally, mind you. I just live in a world where fiction is fact, and fact can be fiction. They are often interchangeable. Like a Professor Marvel, I can go on for hours about stuff I know nothing about and quote all sorts of studies and research that doesn’t exist. It’s not done maliciously. To me, it’s just play, just like the Wizard’s inner domain of fire, smoke and bellowing voices. It’s for giggles and grins – my giggles and grins.

I profess to also have a large amount of Dorothy in me. I still wonder what’s over the rainbow. That’s how I ended up in Florida I guess. But ultimately, all I wanted to do was find my way home, because, as we all know, there’s no place like home.

It was then that Kat became extremely curious about whom I thought she was. Well, back to the Wizard of Oz we go.

First, Kat’s definitely the Cowardly Lion. She’s much braver than she thinks and if you mess with her cubs, run for your life. The Kat turns lioness and will scratch your eyes out. You’d never know that if you just meet her casually, her happy-go-lucky nature disguising boundless courage, particularly in the midst of trial and adversity. She doesn’t really need a medal for her valor; she has the battle scars to prove it.

She’s also very much the Tin Man, for she has such an amazing heart. I have never known anyone who can love more fully, deeply and completely. Just when you think she’s found a limit to the amount of love she can have, she finds more. A boundless supply of love, caring, warmth, support and acceptance. I find such strength in that and I can safely say that it’s rubbing off on me now too.

I wish the courage thing rubbed off a bit, too. She asked me for an example in life where she would be the courageous one. I reminded her of the time she bought her new car. Within a week or so the dealership backed it into a post during setup. If it were I, I would have let them fix it and not make a fuss. But Kat felt there was true injustice and demanded a new car. They gave it to her. I would have never asked, nor would I have stuck to my guns when they first said no. She just dug in for the fight. Amazing!

She’s a bit of the Scarecrow too, I must admit. She went to the school of hard knocks and while she would like to hide behind the fact that she doesn’t have a college degree, she’s by far one of the smartest women I’ve ever known. She is able to not only keep up with me, but often pass me by like I am standing still – not only staying tit for tat, but titting me twenty times over. And yes, you can go into the gutter on that one.

Yes, these are the kinds of talks we have all the time. Grab a glass or two of wine and we’re off to the races, exploring some facet of life, comparing notes and most amazingly, listening to and learning from one another.

That’s the best part of this relationship; the give and take of our two collective souls going on rides together. Sorry Disneyland, but you’ve got nothing that’s half as fun as this daily ride we’re on. The only thing that ruins it, is having to go to work, where we have to suspend playtime so that we can pay the bills.

Given the choice, I think we’d rather just have more time together. Who knows, maybe we’d find more characters from the Wizard of Oz that fit our personalities.

Eventually we could play all the parts, if we were to do a production of Wizard of Oz. Certainly the leads. I could play Dorothy and the Wizard, fake my way through the palace guard (“Who goes there?”), the horse of a different color carriage driver, and Kat could easily handle the Scarecrow, Tin Man and Cowardly Lion, with a little Glinda thrown in for good measure.

Ooh, we’d need a Wicked Witch. Hhm. I guess I’d better make a collect call on the old crystal ball to Florida.

In the Emerald City, wondering if someone’s dropped a house on her yet,

– Robb


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