I have had my fill of Disney. And this is a real shame, since I have been a Disney Kid since Walt Disney first introduced me to his Wonderful World of Color back in the 1960s. It was the only way for me to be able to visit Disneyland, and later on, Disney World, for my family was much too poor to ever mount an adventure down to Mouse Town.
Of course, I also got to see Mary Poppins, Swiss Family Robinson, The Parent Trap, The Absent Minded Professor and Babes in Toyland on the big screen. My mom and I would regularly indulge in the latest Disney blockbuster, paying 75¢ to sit in the luxurious loge seats at the Roxy Theatre in downtown Renton.
This truly was the heyday for Disney. Walt was still alive. He was still in control of his empire, from the parks to every movie that carried the Disney name.
Then that dark day came when Walt died in 1966. The genius who lit my life as a child had his own life extinguished.
Disney has limped on without Walt since. Oh sure, there are stout defenders of what Disney has become since and I admit that I loved my time at the parks in my adult years. I even had season passes in Florida, being able to drop down to the parks whenever the mood struck me. “Hey, let’s go down to the Magic Kingdom, ride the Pirates of the Caribbean Ride, then head over to the Adventurer’s Club for a couple of shows before heading home” was a regular battle cry when I lived in Floriduh.
But then the Adventurer’s Club was closed unceremoniously, as was most of Downtown Disney. The Pirates of the Caribbean Ride got a makeover with Jack Sparrow popping up everywhere and for me, well, the magic began to be far less magical.
It’s not that I can’t handle change. I dealt with the fact that they “reimagined” the Swiss Family Robinson Treehouse in Disneyland into the Tarzan tree. I even embraced the changes at the Disney-MGM Studios, um, Disney’s Hollywood Studios, and soon (I have no idea, but I know they CEO Iger hinted they are changing the name of that park again). Life moves on, tastes change, new ideas come to the forefront.
But I can’t help but think Walt is rolling over in his grave at the lack of imagination among his Imagineers. Thankfully, there’s still Pixar or their animated movie world would already be dead. It was dying long ago. Just look at most of the projects that happened after Walt’s death. The Aristocats, Escape to Witch Mountain, The Black Hole, Return to Oz – not exactly stellar works. Can you go on the Escape to Witch Mountain Ride at Disney? No, because the movie sucked and Disney would rather forget it, like Song of the South and Something Wicked This Way Comes (which is great, by the way, and would give the carousel at any Disney park new meaning).
But this isn’t really about my own experience with Disney. I admit that I have my prejudices and I never really got beyond the second set of Mouseketeers, the one with Lisa Whelchel. I still have a crush on her.
But let’s go back to the real reason why Walt is spinning like a top in Cinderella’s Castle (Uh-huh, like they would really bury his popsicled corpse off Disney property). Disney has lost all its creativity!!
Taking Pixar out of the mix, the latest spate of Disney movies that are “re-imagining” classic Disney films are what’s keep Walt’s restless soul from finding eternal peace in the big theme park in the sky.
Walt would never have remade Cinderella. Yes, it brought in oodles and buckets of cash. But really? Was it necessary? About as necessary as Haunted Mansion, which is now in pre-production. And fresh on the heels of these comes – wait for it – Mulan, Jungle Book, Beauty and the Beast and Dumbo. Yes, Dumbo. Don’t ask me where they are getting a real flying elephant and I can hardly wait until they smooth over that scene with his mother to make it all sugary sweet and not slightly unsettling, since she was deemed mad and was shot (oops, sorry, that was Bambi’s mother).
No matter. I assume Disney will just Cuisinart everything in their re-imagining minds(?) and call it good. It’s all about making money these days. Why bother wracking one’s brain for a new idea, something breathtakingly fresh, when all you have to do is reach back into the Disney archives and pull an oldy but goody out of Walt’s wildly creative ass, “re-imagine” it as a live action picture, cast some big names into it, film it all on green screen, and call it good. Pass go, Collect a gabillion dollars and break all the rules by adding a movie ride to EPCOT (which they are doing with Frozen).
I can hardly wait to see what’s next. I loved that Maleficent. It was fresh, it told a bold new story about a classic evil character and it was never a Disney animated feature. Angelina Jolie was born to the role and I didn’t even mind all the cgi special effects. It was great!
But Mulan? Really? I liked the animated version. I thought they did a great job of it. But is it really going to be any better as live action? Lucy Lu is a little old to play Mulan, folks. She would be the only one worth watching because she could just Charlie’s Angels all over the set (in the same high heeled boots I would hope) and in no time the battle is over. She doesn’t even need any of the other soldiers. Lucy Lu could be the entire movie.
Sorry, but the Imagineers these day seem to be the most unimaginative people on earth. I mean, Frozen, arguably one of their biggest hits in recent years, was written by Hans Christian Andersen in 1844. It had been in the Disney mill since 1937, but only emerged in 2011 because Tangled unexpectedly made Disney money. “Well,” they said, “What other tortured heroine do we have around here that isn’t original, as that’s Pixar’s job?”
They pulled Frozen out of the deep freeze and made another gabillion dollars, then turned around and made it a live action on Once Upon a Time, another Disney property.
Anyone hear a Cuisinart? They’re working overtime in the land of Disney,
In the Emerald City, wishing upon a star that someone would do something original and creative for a change,
– Robb