RobZerrvations
Musings from a Meandering, Mischievous Mind
It’s All Good. In Small Doses.
When I was a kid, most of the medicine on the market was pretty vile. Well, at least the medicine my mother made me take. I guess she thought that a good tasting medicine couldn't possibly be effective as there couldn't be enough actual medicine in it. Instead of getting those sugary kid cold syrups, mom would offer me up spoonful after spoonful of Robitussin. I can still taste it on occasion, as one of my taste buds seems to have been permanently altered by the stuff. There was an upside to...
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree.
I have had many Christmas trees over the years. I suppose most of us have. If we were to save the one from last year I don't think we would appreciate it as much, given that all its needles would have turned a brittle red, if there were any needles left. Having come back home from the tropical hinterlands, what to do for a Christmas tree this year was something of a conundrum. In our haste to ditch the Sunshine State, we had left the old tree behind, yes, a fake tree which had seen its better...
I’m Obsolete? Can I Get My Money Back?
If you've ever owned a piece of electronics, then you know what planned obsolescence is. It's a diabolical plot where the latest and greatest will soon become obsolete. You know the drill. You buy the iPad 2 and the 3 comes out. Buy the iPad 3 and the 3.5 comes out with new gizmos. If you're a music lover, you definitely know how planned obsolescence works. We went from LPs and 45s to cassettes, CDs, flash drives and now the cloud. I still have a CD player in my car, though I'm not sure why....
The Break Up Rules.
It dawned on me yesterday that some people don't seem to know the Break Up Rules. Yes, there is a set of rules, albeit unwritten ones, about how and when to break up. Yes, men have given break ups a lot of thought over the ages. There's something of an art to it, as well as science. It must be timed and executed correctly. If it's not, the results could be what we commonly refer to as an "ugly scene." Let's start with the basics here. No guy worth his salt breaks up in a text message. That's...
Flag Football.
When I was about 10 years old, I discovered football. I don't really know what has happened to the sport; it seemed pretty popular back then. Everyone would watch it on black and white TVs, which often made it really hard to tell who had the ball. If it weren't for the logos on the helmets, I'm not sure I could always tell which side was the Green Bay Packers and which was the Bears. But I was a diehard football fan. The Packers were my team. I loved Bart Starr and Vince Lombardi. I thrilled...
Playing Around.
I wish sometimes that my brain would show me the marvelous way it works. I often refer to it as a mental Cuisinart, which is about as close as I can come to it. I suppose a Dyson vacuum would also make a good analogy, as everything I've ever seen, heard, tasted or experienced gets sucked up into the brain bag, waiting for the day when there's no choice but to empty it, which thankfully, is every day. I say this because random things and people come to mind. A great example was last night. On...
The Princess & The Pirate.
Once upon a time there lived a pirate. He was not your average pirate, for he lived life in the wood, not on the sea. It didn't really bother him much, as he had found a quite nice life there in the wood and besides, he couldn't remember where he had last left his ship. In the wood was a wonderful maiden who lived not far away. The pirate had spotted her one day as he walked to town. She lived in a cottage down by the stream. She was not at her best when he first set eyes on her. Her flock of...
Following The Equator
It's funny how things circle around this world of ours. At times we decide to make a run for it, thinking that better times lie somewhere else, only to snap back like a rubber band and find that something was wrong with you, not the location. In many respects my life has been a Dorothy Gale experience, thinking that no one understands me at home and that there is a better place somewhere out there, just beyond the rainbow. The only difference is that I tried to escape the Emerald City, landing...
It’s A Trip.
Last Friday I went to town. Ordinarily, that is hardly earth shaking news, given that I work downtown these days and trudge off to catch the bus every morning about this time. The difference this time is that I went there voluntarily to enjoy the Figgy Pudding Contest and a little shopping at Macys. That's right, on when I telecommute I decided after work to fight the traffic and head to town, just like I do the other days of the week. Madness? Yes! But hard to resist? An equal yes. The simple...
Rum Runners.
A week or so ago, I heard that a fellow pirate had passed away. It seems to be happening with greater frequency. Though I have tried to fill my life with people younger than I to stem the tide of the dying, there are some who have slipped through the cracks anyway. Butch and I never really got along. But that doesn't really matter when you're in a small, tight knit group like I was. There is a certain level of respect that goes with the territory. It was with this measure of respect that I...
Dog-Gone.
I have been preparing my book of RobZerrvations, pulling out the best of 2011 and putting them into book form. One of the stories that made the cut (there are 267 to choose from) was a story of the Big Mook, my beagle Jasper. In editing the story, I noticed that I had promised to talk about my other dog at some point. Sadly, I haven't yet, but I am now going to remedy it here. If you've been reading right along with the bouncing ball, you've heard of Barney before. He was a Labrador/Beagle...
Airing Some Dirty Laundry.
It's strange what goes through my mind. Not at times. Constantly. I can be in a meeting and my brain is humming along to some obscure song lyrics. I can be watching TV and thinking about kumquats and why I've never tried one. And then there are those showstoppers, such as the difference between right and wrong when it comes to men and women. Oh, I know, that's a heady topic to take on, the differences between men and women. But it was that very thing that was the topic of conversation last...