RobZerrvations
Musings from a Meandering, Mischievous Mind
Jesus @ Facebook.com
Throughout the workday, Facebook hums along in the background. It's my virtual water cooler, where all my friends gather to discuss... well, sometimes nothing much at all. More often than not, they post little pieces of art that have some supposedly deep thought on it, including some with Jesus speaking what could be perceived as nonsense. That got me to thinking, would Jesus really use Facebook? I suppose he would, as it would save him a lot of walking among the throngs. He could just post...
Living Like George Jetson.
As a kid, I loved The Jetsons. I guess every kid did back then. We were all living at the dawn of the space age where technology held the promise of solving all our greatest problems. While I'm still waiting for the day when I can take a pill that tastes like a juicy Rib Eye and a baked potato slathered with sour cream and chives, I can still pretend to be George Jetson any time by visiting the Space Needle. It was, after all, the inspiration for the Sky Pad Apartments in the series, at least...
Spring Cleaning.
While everyone else worries about Y2K and the end of 2012 bringing about momentous change to the world, I am plagued by April. Yes, April. Not a specific year (though years ending in '4 seem to be harbingers of major changes), but April in general. For most people, April means Easter or tax time. For me, it means big, big changes. How big? Well, let's start with 1984. I was just 26. I was living in Renton, Washington, working in a dead end job in the mailroom at Associated Grocers making...
I Believe In Santa-Fair.
Growing up kind of poor but not knowing it, I always got to live through my friends vicariously, who would go on a big family vacation to Disneyland or some other theme park each summer. Our family didn't seem to ever have the money to travel far, and even if we did, we weren't the traveling kind of family, at least beyond Lincoln City, Oregon. That's not to say I never got to go to a theme park. As any kid in Western Washington knew back in the day, there was always Santafair. With three...
The Newer Testament.
I'm not a big fan of sequels, but they seem to be all around us these days. There are even sequels to really bad movies that themselves, didn't deserve to be made in the first place. Even Gone With the Wind got a sequel, and as we all know, it never needed one. There was something so refreshing about leaving the characters be, leaving each of us to decide for ourselves whatever happened to Scarlett and Rhett. I am really surprised no one ever wrote a sequel to the Bible. Well, I know it can be...
Wrestle You For It!
My son was recently thinking about sports. I guess this isn't unusual for many teenagers but it certainly is for anyone with the last name Zerr. We aren't, now how should I say it, exactly sporty. At best we were all mediocre in sports, except for my oldest brother who lettered in track in high school. His choice of sports were all over the place: basketball, soccer, lacrosse and wrestling. I was moving right along with his list, until he reached the last one. Wrestling. I remembered wrestling...
Time To Kick Some Male Asses!
Men in this country love to go to war. We just left Iraq, we're still in Afghanistan, we're picking a fight with Iran and at various times in our history we've battled the Mexicans, the Brits, the Koreans, the Nazis, the Viet Cong and the Grenadians. But I think the latest adversary will prove too much for the male leadership of the U.S. and many states now at war against this worthy opponent. I think they are unleashing a powerful, unrelenting force of unimaginable intelligence and...
The Son Also Rises.
Over this last weekend, I was reminded of the birth of my son almost 14 years ago. It was one of those stories that I still have a chuckle over, largely because like nearly all stories of children coming into this world, this one didn't go according to plan. We had big plans, too. We were going to enjoy the brand new birthing rooms at Harrison Hospital in Bremerton. Parker's mommy, Sharon, was going to indulge in the restaurant-quality menu they had in place. We were going to welcome our baby...
Hang ‘Em High!
There was a story in the Seattle papers a few weeks ago about a little boy who brought a gun to class. Not any gun, mind you. But a .45. Well, to make a long story short, the gun in his backpack discharged and the bullet hit a classmate who suffered life threatening injuries. She's probably going to be OK, but has already endured five hours of operation and almost died during treatment. The boy was charged in the case. But the best part of the story is so was his mother, Jamie Lee Chaffin and...
Bring On Pornobition!
If you remember your American history, which Rick Santorum obviously doesn't, the quickest way to get any Americans to do anything is to make it illegal. That's why Prohibition failed so miserably. It was one of the biggest disasters in the history of legislating American behavior. Even people who were lifelong teetotalers took to drinking in droves because it was fashionable and daring. Let's face it, Americans love to take a walk on the wild side and dabble in things that are strictly...
The Drinking Of The Green.
I don't celebrate St. Patrick's Day. Sorry, but I'm not Irish. Not even a wee bit. One of my best friends who is from Belfast doesn't celebrate it either. So at least I am in good company. That is not to say I haven't had my share of corned beef and cabbage and green beer over the years. In fact, I drank so much green beer one year that I was still pissing it out the next morning, which scared the crap out of me. But all these pseudo celebrations pale in comparison to my jaunt one year as the...
The Jig Is Up, Folks!
I’m told with great regularity that I am an extremely creative guy. I usually just shrug my shoulders, largely because I don’t know how to be any other way. As Jessica Rabbit once said, “I was just drawn that way.” I thought I was just born that way. But now I have found that I was wrong. I wasn't born this way at all. Everyone out there - you included - can get the same creative chops. I only know this because I happened upon a really interesting article in the Wall Street Journal a couple...